Marriage Challenge Round-up

Domestic, Marriage

In this post, I’m participating in Completing Him Challenge and Marriage Mondays.

As I mentioned a couple of posts ago, I lost my Grandmother in the last few weeks and stepped away from the blog for a bit. Though I wasn’t blogging, I was still participating in the marriage challenge. 🙂 My Granny loved my husband and always thought he ‘had a good head on his shoulders’, which is a phrase I hold dear because only my Granny, my parents and my husband ever say it and when they do, the person they’re talking about is always special. I’ll recap the weeks I missed here, and then thoughts on the whole process.

I last posted on week #5, which was priorities in marriage, and making sure mine are kept in line with his. The conversation was very helpful, and surprising that it was actually, because we routinely talk about every item on the list, I just always had them in a different order!

Week #6 was about following your husband’s lead and his vision for your family. Depending on how this is worded, the idea is received differently. The very concept of a wife following her husband’s lead simply because he is their husband is so foreign it even seems wrong to some people. I tend to think of it more like, I picked him as my husband 10 years ago because, among other reasons, he is a good leader and is a smart, level headed guy. I would not have married him if I didn’t think I could trust his judgment. While he’s figuring stuff out, he’ll bounce ideas off me, we talk about possible plans and I’m usually part of the brainstorming process, but to me it’s not the end of the world if I’m not. Very few times have I been hesitant to do something he’s planned to do, but since his decisions keep end up being sound, I haven’t had any reason to be!

The week 6 challenge suggested we talk with our husbands about their goals for the family in 1 year, 5 years and 10 years. We love talking about this stuff so we do it often. I already knew his vision for our family, and I am totally on board. <3

Week 7 was about respecting your husband, and asking what it is you do that makes him feel disrespected. Sometimes it really is little things that we do that can have the biggest impact. Think about the little things that bug you about your husband – do you think he even knows? My husband reaffirmed a few things I already knew, like eye rolling, information overload when he gets up, bugging him to hang out, and not keeping up with the house or going horribly off budget. He also mentioned a few things I didn’t think would be on the list, and I am thankful for the heads up.

I think it’s important to be mindful of the things I do that bother my husband, if for no other reason than to have a peaceful home. How much better is everyone’s day if I’m not part of whatever happens to contribute to a rough day for him? Plus really, he’s respectful to me, so why wouldn’t I be??

Our last week was my favourite as any regular reader would know. Week 8 was about sex, mainly focused on being open to having it as much as our husbands want it. In my marriage we have the opposite issue where I bug him for it more than I probably should. As I mentioned in my post on priorities, my husband says ‘there are more important things’ – it has been suggested that he feels this way because he knows I’m always into it so it’s not something he ever has to stress about. Having said all of that I know we still fit into the ‘often’ category, so it’s not like I’m horribly neglected. 😉 The overall goal of this challenge though was to get on your husband’s wave, either way. If you happen to be in my shoes instead of the more often written about ‘SAHM is exhausted and husband wants to get it on every night’ situation, it’s just as important that we lay off our husbands as it is the tired new mommies put out. You dig?

I really liked this challenge and I’m sort of bummed that it’s over. I’m going to take everything I’ve learned and be mindful to apply it to daily life – where it really matters. I would love to get in on more group challenges like this one. Even when I’m left shaking my head and not sure exactly how I’m supposed to handle the situation, I just love him like when I was 18, so I want to do the best I can. <3

 

4 Comments

4 Comments

  1. Julie@comehaveapeace  •  Aug 17, 2010 @6:42 pm

    What a sweet gift for you to know how your Granny loved your husband. It sounds like she left a great legacy in your life.

    Blessings,
    Julie

    Thanks Julie! She really did, she was amazing.

  2. Gertha  •  Aug 24, 2010 @9:31 am

    I hate it when we loose pieces of our family’s puzzle. Your Granny sounds like she was truly loved. Thank you for your comment. I agree with your post. It’s very important we stay on our “husband’s wave”. Nice pics of your wedding! I am glad we met on the challenge:-).

    Me too!! Thanks!

  3. Leah  •  Aug 31, 2010 @8:32 am

    Hi Maytina! I’ve came poking around your blog before but must have got distracted before leaving a comment..so now here I am! I saw you had left a few comments over at my friend Christina’s blog and didn’t even realize till shortly after that you had left such a nice comment on my better betimes post at KOTH. I know I’m horribly behind but I wanted to let you know that I appreciated your encouragement. It sounds like we have a lot in common (except that you cook way better, and take way better pictures,..etc. LOL) So anyway, I hope you are doing alright dealing with the loss of your granny. Surely she would want you to laugh and remember the good times! Have a great week. 🙂

    Aww thank you!! I do really love reading your posts at KOTH and your friend’s blog is great too. 🙂 Thanks for commenting.

  4. Gill  •  Sep 10, 2010 @7:48 pm

    Yay, got caught up on your blog. U are missed young lady!

    YOU are missed!! Can’t wait for my birthday gathering next month. <3

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